Childhood Trauma: I Need You To Go Easy On Me

Scrolling down Tik Tok, I couldn’t help but hear Adele’s song “Easy On Me.” Of course, the song got stuck in my head, which brought to my mind the topic of childhood trauma and inner-child healing. I couldn’t stop singing the chorus:

“Go easy on me baby/I was still a child/Didn’t get the chance to/Feel the world around me/I had no time to choose/What I chose to do/So go easy on me.”

Something we don’t talk about much is healing our inner-child wounds. Most of the time, our childhood experiences affect our behaviors, relationships, and personality as we grow into adulthood, especially if we experienced abuse, neglect, bullying, abandonment, or other traumas and illnesses as a child.

Both the good and the bad, we take it all with us into adulthood.

We grow older with everyone surrounding us thinking they know what’s best for us without much say in our direction until we are adults or far into years after we turn 18.

All of these expectations get placed on us at a young age that, at times, are hard to fulfill. Having to grow up fast or getting in trouble for minor imperfections. Asking, “can you take it easy on me?” We all need time to learn from our mistakes and grow into our being. There is more need for patience and guidance over control in a child’s life.

They say it’s OK to cry, but when we’re younger, we’re told, “I will give you something to cry about.”

They say it’s OK to express your emotions, but when we’re younger, we’re told to “act normal” or “why can’t you be like so and so?”

You go to school and don’t fit in; you go to work and can’t be yourself. It’s challenging to find a circle of people that legitimately see “YOU.” When the wrong people surround you, the way you express yourself is embarrassing to them in public. Your uniqueness can be seen as competition, and your personality will irritate them—growing older, feeling sad, and internally alone.

Blowing bubbles, being goofy, coloring, or dancing on social media is looked at as “childish” when that inner expression and passion are what we need to tap into more often to revive that child in us who wants to have fun and still feel accepted.

It’s even harder to let your inner child out as an adult when you didn’t have a chance to express yourself as a kid, and that’s when we start shutting down and allowing addictions, fear, and self-sabotage to get in the way of our happiness and healing.

All of the unhealed trauma can stop us dead in our tracks and keep us from moving forward. We can’t change the past, so instead of continuing old habits and digging a deeper hole, we have to be the ones to change our future even though it’s not easy.

Healing ourselves allows us to fill our own cup up first before filling up someone else’s to avoid the emotions boiling inside. Even when we have good intentions, it’s hard to come from a genuine place if there is pain still lingering around in our hearts, in our souls.

How do I know this? I’ve been there and have gotten myself through some tough times, and I still struggle and have triggers, so I understand working through the childhood pain and trauma all too well.

I learned to give more grace and show more compassion to others because we are all trying to figure out the next pieces to our puzzle. I’ve conversed with numerous people, and we all seem to have similar experiences but different stories.

Give yourself more credit for how far you have come and who you are now. We have to be our own breath of fresh air because contentment comes from within, which no one else or another thing can fulfill.

Turn your stories and lesson into wisdom. Surround yourself with people who will continue to congratulate your progress. The child inside you needs you, so be easy on yourself.

Adele — Easy On Me. Genius. (n.d.). Retrieved December 9, 2021, from https://genius.com/Adele-easy-on-me-lyrics.

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