Step Into Your Power Even If You Feel Misunderstood

Original Taken In San Diego, CA

We are constantly told to “fake it until we make it.” This statement is valuable to a certain extent. You can fake it externally, but the facade will only last so long if you don’t fix it internally. Have you ever been so broken inside but smiled at everyone around you? When you get alone, you are so mentally and emotionally drained that you don’t even know if you can go on like this any longer. The facade happens when the ego mask is put on to avoid working through your feelings.

I say this because I used to “fake the funk” all of the time. I would have so much going on in my life, but I wouldn’t like to tell anyone. I always felt like I was being dramatic or over-emotional. My thoughts were, “nobody understands me anyway” or “they are going to think I am too emotional.”

With that said, if you don’t release the burdens and pain that is hurting inside of you, you will never show up as your true self. You will end up finding different ways to cope with your feelings. Drugs, alcohol, shopping, or emotional eating are some of the coping mechanisms used to numb the pain inside temporarily. You might continue to dwell on the past and worry about the future. Never feeling fulfilled or whole.

When we live without healing the hurt inside, we tend to project that pain onto other people. The inner pain can cause jealousy, envy, and hate. You quickly get triggered or irritable, and you can find it hard to accept a compliment.

Someone can tell you that you are beautiful, intelligent, kind, and loving, but it won’t matter if you don’t believe it. You get these thoughts like “if I was so beautiful, then I would have a significant other” or “If I was so intelligent, then I would be rich by now.” That’s not true. The people telling you this really see something in you that you can’t at the moment.

We all have so much potential, but you won’t know your worth until you feel it within yourself. Nobody can tell you how you should be except for yourself. You have to believe in your capabilities and success. They can only encourage you to see your worth.

The façade is who we want to be or want others to see us as and not who we are. There is a fear of being judged for not being like everyone else. Actually, you WILL get judged for not being like everyone else, and that can be scary. It’s either suffering for the rest of your life to withhold an image or saying fuck it and moving fearlessly with your own mentality. The right people will value your uniqueness.

Working through your emotions, pain, and hurt is terrifying. The agony you feel after bringing back up childhood memories and past traumas can cause you to suppress it until you can’t feel it anymore. We all have endured pain in our lives, and we all process it differently.

So many people made me feel like I didn’t have a voice and that I would never amount to anything. I got made fun of growing up, and I never really fit in. Because I listened heavily to the opinions others had about me, I stayed in the mentality of never being good enough. I protected myself at all costs, and I didn’t allow many to get close to me.

I have always liked who I am, but I let people make me feel like I couldn’t be my emotional, unique, witty, fun self.

When you grow up around toxic friends or family, live in certain neighborhoods or environments, have been abused, neglected, abandoned, etc., it feels like you have to do whatever it takes to protect yourself in order to survive. Not expressing yourself gets so lonely sometimes. I understand.

Trust me, I do.

I have spent most of my life feeling lonely and survived off of my ego, constantly hanging out with who I thought were friends, being in toxic relationships, partying, working, just constantly on the go so that I didn’t have to think. Think about my lifestyle, choices, thoughts, past, and why I was never happy. I felt unlovable, lost, unmotivated, and so sad inside.

Working through your emotions is painful and can take years to understand why you are the way you are. I found that self-help books and podcasts, therapy, and distancing from toxic people and environments are some excellent places to start.

Once you work through it, you will feel as free as a bird. You will start to care less about what anyone thinks of you, and others will no longer be able to dim your light. You will also be a calmer, more loving person on the inside and out.

Your protective ego shield will fade, and you will start to feel comfortable in your skin. Expressing yourself and emotions will come naturally. Deep down, you know who you are and your capabilities so, don’t be afraid to show it. Not everyone is going to understand you or your journey, and that’s okay. Put yourself first and stand in your power. Even if you are the only one that believes in you, you can still make it so far in life!

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