Stop Being The Go-To Person In All Of Your Relationships

Original Taken In Minneapolis, MN

Feeling like everyone in your life depends on you when they need something gets exhausting. Especially when you are constantly providing love, support, money, and time to them, but they don’t lift a finger for you. They will use you for advice, money, or emotional fulfillment.

Some just want to be a part of your success and happiness. Saying “no” might be tricky because they are family, close friends, or bosses. You might feel like setting limitations will hurt you more than it hurts them. But if you don’t set boundaries, eventually, these vultures will keep coming until you have nothing left.

See, they want access to you, but they don’t want to reciprocate what you bring to the relationship. You can fulfill this person in every way, but the only reason they will come to you is for you to keep filling their cup up. They can say they love you and care about you all they want to, but their actions have to line up.

The difficult part to understand is that you don’t have to give them anything. Your time, space, money, and energy are yours for a reason. You have the power to control what you want to share and what you don’t. You might feel obligated to do things for them if they are an important part of your life, but you do not have to do it.

Take a moment and step back from all of the relationships that you have with your family and friends. Are you always the person giving more than receiving? Do they genuinely ask you how your day is going? Would they go out of their way for you if you needed their help? Now, how many of these people would give you the same energy if you reversed the roles?

If you can think of anyone who isn’t returning their love to you, it’s time to set some boundaries with them or remove them from your life.

Why so harsh, you say? You would be surprised at the number of people that would never talk to you again if you didn’t go above and beyond for them. Some don’t even want to be in your life; they just need a piece of you for the moment. They know you will pick up the phone and say yes when they need you for something.

The feelings are not mutual with these types of individuals. If they were, you would receive the same amount of respect, love, and time that you provide.

Why do we give others so much when they give us so little? There are many different reasons. You could be a people pleaser. You are nervous to say no because you don’t want to hurt their feelings or have never set boundaries before. There is the longing to feel needed by someone. There is a sense of control you have over others when they need you.

Maybe you don’t even realize the person is using you. No matter why you do it, it is crucial to recognize the issue and solve it before it becomes overwhelming. It is up to you to block yourself from their manipulation, control, and negative energy.

Suppose you have built your life around people that are sucking you dry. It’s time to check in with yourself and re-evaluate who you decide to have around you. Try to take a good look at who you can depend on and who comes to you when they need something. Even if it’s a small gesture, saying yes all the time will keep them coming back to you for more.

Cutting them out of your life can be challenging. You might not know what to say or how to do it. Please take a deep breath and tell them how you truly feel. If they decide to give up on the relationship, you will know that they weren’t down for you like you thought they were. If they don’t change their actions after you expressed your feelings, walk away with your head held high. You can also walk away without a trace.

Your life will be so much better without them! It might get a bit lonely at first, but nothing is wrong with that. Being alone helps you heal your inner wounds and learn more about your wants and needs. You will feel the empowerment in taking back your power.

You deserve to be appreciated and loved. If you continue to give people what they don’t work for, they will never learn their life lessons. Don’t be someone’s cushion so they can sit comfortably while you struggle to hold them up. It is not your duty or obligation to take care of these people.

Love yourself enough to say no to what you don’t want to and don’t have to do. You will lighten your load once you free yourself from these energy vampires. Doing this will make you a happier person and gain more confidence in yourself which will help you attract better, more fulfilling people into your life!

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