Seeking Validation Is Your Worst Enemy

Original Taken From My Wall

Sometimes there is a need to seek validation from others when we don’t believe in ourselves. Not everyone that we seek advice from believes in our goals and dreams, which can be detrimental to our future. Not only can someone steer us in the wrong direction, but they can also make us feel unworthy and insecure to move forward in our success and beliefs.

You will have your ride or dies and your haters. That goes for every decision that you decide to make in your life. Everyone has their own opinion, and with that said, they will either agree or disagree.

Now, it’s up to you if you want to take the lead and go with your gut or listen to the opinion of others and have them change your gut feeling. The people you surround yourself with can influence your daily lives if you let them. You can seek out advice from a friend, and they can completely change your thoughts by the end of the conversation.

The advice you receive can help your situation or harm it. It depends on that person’s motives. Some people will give genuine guidance because they care about you and want what’s best for you. You might not want to hear the truth, but even with their advice, deep down, you know what you should do.

Unfortunately, some individuals would love to see your downfall or don’t particularly care about your life. They only care about what is beneficial to them. Taking your power back and doing what you want to will take away the control they feel that they have over you.

It’s natural to ask someone, “Do you like my outfit?” “How am I doing at work?” Do you think I should do this? But what do you think? Since we were kids, we tried to fit in with the crowd. We are constantly told things we need to improve at work. Our closest friends and family will critique our life which makes us strive for their approval. Society today has an unrealistic beauty standard that makes us change our outer beauty and lose our authenticity.

At times we live to perfect our lives, standards, and opinions so that we won’t have to “hear their mouths.” Do you dare to be different? Vice versa. Do you accept others that don’t have the same path and opinion as you? We forget that two people are not the same.

There is so much creativity lost because people want to be like someone else or are afraid of the backlash they will receive for being perceived as the odd one. If you don’t mold yourself into what is conventional, there is the possibility of being outcasted. Nobody wants that.

What is important is what you think. The fear of judgment and backlash can hinder you from following your own direction. Seeking validation will eventually make you question your thoughts. This is where overthinking comes into play. You will start to second guess your decisions because what other people will think about it will replay in your head.

You can keep seeking validation from outside sources, or you can follow the beat of your own drum. Moving in a different direction in life that is different from those around you will get lonely for a while, but eventually, you will find others that beat that same drum. At least you can be yourself without walking on eggshells. Find people that like your goofy, quirky, beautiful self. You deserve it!

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